We did find ugly for the big holiday theme party

The invitation came by Facebook a couple of weeks ago, a call for my dear wife Karen and I to join friends for a festive holiday party. The theme for this particular soiree: ugly sweater.

We talked, checked our social calendar — wide open — and RSVP’ed to the positive.

Saturday we will savor a ‘nog or two, figuratively. Literally, I will stick to swilling beer.

I do believe my dear wife Karen wins the family contest.

I do believe my dear wife Karen wins the family contest.

Last night we addressed the final problem.

Neither of us will admit to owning an ugly sweater. No, our fashion sense is way too unquestionable for that, individually and collectively. What I mean by that is, Karen would not let me buy an ugly sweater, would not give me the present of an ugly sweater and would arch an eyebrow before I left our house wearing anything resembling an ugly sweater for any occasion other than this theme party. As for Karen’s wardrobe, well, I’ll go with the description impeccable taste.

Off we went to the Salvation Army Thrift Store, or Sally Ann’s, if you’d rather put a little shine on the shoe.

We were sure we could both find clothing that somebody, somewhere, deemed too old, too superfluous, too unnecessary, too unwanted to stick around in the closet or drawer. We were determined that no matter what, we’d go home with pieces that also were too ugly for anything other than this party.

Besides, the money we’d fork over would go to a great cause.

We succeeded.

I went for the ugly plaid jacket for Saturday's holiday theme party.

I went for the ugly plaid jacket for Saturday’s holiday theme party.

Karen found an ugly sweater AND an equally ugly T-shirt to wear underneath it. The sweater is a button-down. It’s lavender-like, a color, really, that you won’t find in nature. It has silly-looking blue snowflakes on it. The front of the T-shirt is adorned by that winter advertisement of a polar bear dunking a basketball.

I came home with a hideous, red-plaid sports jacket. I do not think that it was ever presented to the winner of a golf tournament, but that it’s that degree of traffic-stopping. I will wear a green T-shirt underneath to be more seasonal.

There’s a good chance that Sally Ann’s will get them back on Sunday.

And yes, I will try on Saturday to take pictures of the uglies around us to entertain you all at a later date.

25 thoughts on “We did find ugly for the big holiday theme party

  1. Pingback: Ugly sweater shots from a really beautiful party | markbialczak

    • I hope the most important word on the invitation is ‘ugly,’ Rachel. With that jacket, they will have to let me in. Do they do anything of this sort in London, or is it just us zany Americans?


      • People do have ‘Eurovision’ parties. I don’t know where to start with explaining that – it’s a European song contest – the songs are alarmingly bad and Britain never gets any votes! People have a party to watch the show, which lasts for hours. The voting is tedious and there aren’t even any adverts. It’s so bad it’s good!


      • Simon Cowell is no where to be seen (yippee). It’s a Europe wide public vote – immensely political. Russia vote for Ukraine, Latvia for Estonia, Italy for Albania and so on. Lots of fun in a way because the audience can see it coming.


  2. Thrift shops are where those sweaters go to die unless someone throws that kind of party. Somewhere in the world, people are making those things and wondering how anyone could have the guts to wear one.


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