Bye gopher, don’t come back now, ya’ hear

/ June 28, 2014
Yeah, you match the post office mug shot.

Yeah, you match the post office mug shot.

Broccoli, cantaloupe and watermelon.

The Syracuse-based animal control guy knew his gopher bait.

Within three hours of our phone conversation today, our backyard nemesis wandered into our humane trap, and the June nightmare, the battle of wits, the terrorization of Ellie B aka Dogamous Pyle, was over.

The furry was stuck inside the bars and couldn’t get out. I dropped a big towel over the whole affair and put it into the back of my dear wife Karen’s vehicle.

Go to the end of the world and hang a right.

Go to the end of the world and hang a right.

We drove far enough out of the city of Syracuse that no homes will be victimized by the newly freed gopher, who scurried like his life depended on it when I released the spring-set door.

I had taken enough turns and traveled enough miles that this critter will not be finding its way into our backyard again.

Now Karen, Ellie B and I are hoping that there’s only been one gopher taunting us.

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60 thoughts on “Bye gopher, don’t come back now, ya’ hear”

  3. I know you don’t want to hear this, but he was kinda cute. But still bad! I’m glad you got rid of him humanely and I’m glad Ellie B is safe now. Please hug her for me. 🙂 And congratulations! Oh, and thanks for keeping us updated and taking the time to take photos! VERY cool! 😀

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  6. Yay! Buh Bye Moriarty!

    Don’t let the door slam you in the arse on the way out!

    Mark, I hope he was the only one too, but if he wasn’t, you are an expert and will quickly catch any other gopher that dares show his face in your ‘hood. 🙂
    Diana xo

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  7. This was so nice of you, Mark! You are my hero for the day! I always appreciate that people choose not to kill animals, especially ones that are not really (on purpose) being mean! My friends took their Mama Skunk and her babies out into the country. I did for a moment think, wonder if the Daddy Skunk was missing his family? Anyway, I watched the adorable and well acted movie, “Miss Potter” last night and would like to recommend it to all who loved Beatrix and animals, too! Such lovely scenery of the hills and dales of England. Also, she accumulated quite a lot of royalties and donated 4000 acres of farmland to a British Preserve or Reserve. Quite unusual for the times… Renee Zwelleger and Ewan McGregor. I even thought it was funny that she had written about Peter Rabbit in the farmer’s, Mr. McGregor’s garden! Mom loved the movie and it somehow ties in with your garden animals, too! Hope Ellie B. is now relaxing a bit more!

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  8. Mark, I hate to be a party pooper, but it’s dangerous to gloat in such a case. Beth is right, there may be more family members there. However, you did drive him far, far away, so it’s unlikely he will find his way back. Be on the alert for other members of the family, though. I speak from experience, my mother had a family in her yard, and the animal control guy trapped them and took them away, but perhaps he just circled around the block, budget cuts, and all.
    I’m sending good gopher karma your way…:-)

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  9. yay! it sounds like he kept to a pretty healthy diet in order to stay in top ‘hide and seek’ shape. luckily, you had perseverance on your side. ellie can rest easy now. that is, unless he left a group of family and friends behind …..) hope he likes his new digs – well done, mark.

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    • Thanks, Beth. Knock on wood, so far, no other furries have arrived on backup duty to take over his living room.

      Today’s your big day. Wow. Yay. Cool. 🙂 How many years since the last visit?

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      • exactly, mark and well-played. as for the aussies, i spent the summer with them last year, and they have not been here or seen the sisters in 2 1/2 years. this is the first time all of the babies will meet each other in one place at one time or ever, and the aussies have never met the new babies at all. 12 more hours until they are here…

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      • A season of fantastic family firsts! How fabulous.

        You may use me as your blog post quote if you wish …

        Seriously, embrace them all, breathe in the scents of what you have accomplished, and marvel at it all, my friend.

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  11. We’ve had foxes, hedgehogs, snakes (fortunately down at the end of the property and only one… I think!), a pheasant and a peacock.

    Yep, a peacock. Peacocks are beautiful but they are nasty suckers! And loud. They sound like the dinosaurs in the movie ‘Jurassic Park.’ I have no idea why or how the peacock showed up. We live in the country, but even so – Pennsylvania isn’t peacock country! I called Animal Control – they suggested I trap it in my garage and they’d come and get it. Yeah, like that was going to happen. 🙂 In the end, I think one of the farmers may have shot it since it disappeared after being resident for a few weeks. Can’t say I miss it – I have small dogs, and I always worried the thing would swoop down and hurt them. But I feel for the poor creature, even though I was scared of it.

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    • There’s a peacock next to the golf course my league plays at every Tuesday night, Kate, and it makes the loudest, ugliest sound I’ve ever heard in the almost-wild. It’s awful. I would worry about it swooping down on small domestic animals, too. I think this creature is a pet. That’s what the story is, anyway. I’m glad your Pennsylvania peacock was controlled by a neighbor farmer. Oh, what an awful noise! Thanks for sharing your tale!

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      • The sound is like terrible people doing awful things to somebody. Quick, call the cops, somebody is being tortured! Kate, nobody else will believe us when we say how bad it sounds!

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    • Who knows where the nearest predator lies. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum. Coyote? Fox? I had to throw that in there for the balance of nature, PLGCM. The damn thing did hang off the neck of my beloved Ellie B just two days ago.

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  15. Has history taught you nothing? Your buddy Chuck Rodent was heard quoting General Douglas MacArthur whilst being interviewed tonight. “I said to the people of Eastwood whence I came, I shall return. Tonight, I repeat those words: I shall return.”

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  17. Congratulations, Mark, on a successful “catch and release”! I give you credit for having far more tolerance than I would have had in the same situation and for successfully “relocating” the gopher. Glad Ellie B. and all concerned emerged from this situation unscathed!

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    • Thanks, Mark. I was far more patient than I thought I would have been. Since the skirmish Thursday, I was very teed-off at that gopher. I did breathe a sigh of relief when that gopher ran straight out of the cage toward the woods and did not double back toward me!

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  18. This is really good news Mark. You did a very good job for all there and Ellie B can now enjoy the garden alone again without being attacked, I hope.

    Thanks for sharing this positive post 😀

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  19. I can’t tell you how happy I was to see the picture on this post! BUSTED! Thank goodness you can all live in peace in your own backyard (hopefully). You were good to drive it so far away and I love the comment, “go to the end of the world and hang a right” 🙂 Now for some much needed peace in Syracuse.

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  22. I have such a creature at The House on the Hill. The Girl and I named him Woodrow, and I will often return home to find him sitting on my front steps. Of course, he immediately scurries away when I pull into the driveway, but he is mighty cute.

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